Vicious Wishes' Fandom Corner
Title: #17 Doesn't Bite
Author:
For: chantal87
Fandom: Buffyverse/House
Pairing: House/Spike.
Rating: PG.
Setting: pre-series House and post-"Initiative" BtVS.
Words: 459.
Request: Spike/House (x-over slash).
Summary: Spike never escaped the Initiative and Maggie Walsh never died.

Maggie Walsh was a pompous idiot who was in way over her head. But House already knew that. She'd been the only woman he'd ever considered punching in the face. Lately, his inbox was full of messages from her, asking for extreme diagnoses. He hit delete on all of them because without the patients, without running his own lab tests, what the hell was he supposed to do.

Two weeks after House hired Cameron, Maggie Walsh gave him a call and Cameron answered it. Walsh manipulated Cameron into agreeing to take in one of her patients. She called the patient #17.

"What is that?" Chase said, pointing to the crate that appeared in House's office Thursday afternoon.

"Cuddy finally ordered me that mini bar I always wanted." House tapped his cane against the solid wooden panels. He frowned. They needed to take it apart. "Is there a surgeon whose hacksaw we can borrow?"

Two hours later, Chase found a janitor with a crowbar and the wood paneling peeled away with a crack. Inside the crate, a man with a shaved head sat huddled on the far side. "Oh my god." Chase dropped the crowbar on the floor.

"#17, I take it," House said. It figured that Walsh would transport her patients via wooden box. He was just surprised she hadn't gone with the full on coffin look.

#17 held his head in his hand as if he couldn't see them, then they wouldn't know he was there.

"Chase, get #17 out of there and take it to an empty room. Make sure you close the curtains," House said. He watched as Chase reluctantly stepped into the wooden crate and touched #17 's arm. Walsh must've broken the vampire better than the last time House had toured her facilities as #17 only winced instead of fought. "Cameron, you'll need to make a trip downstairs for blood."

"But... I..." Cameron stood still in shock as she watched Chase take #17 out of the room. "He's human. You can't do that to a human being."

"Actually, #17 is not human. Let's just say it's something straight out of Bram Stroker's imagination." House leaned on his cane and pivoted away from the crate mess. He wondered how long it would take the janitors to remove it. "Don't worry, #17 doesn't bite. In fact, his behavior modification chip prevents him from doing so. Dr. Walsh, I believe you remember talking to her, wanted to market the chips to the military for a new kind of slave soldier. However, #17's chip seems to be going off at random times, giving it uncontrollable electrical shocks."

"And Dr. Walsh thinks you can fix it," Cameron said. Her face was still pale.

House nodded. "Seems to me like I need to look into hiring a neurologist."

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